If you’ve been implementing the 30-second rule, and practicing being safe to talk to, at this point you are probably hearing a lot of opinions. This may not be good news to you! Women often struggle with the wealth of opinions men offer, mostly because women don’t know what to do when they disagree with a man’s opinion.

The most natural way to listen to someone’s opinions is to see if you agree or disagree with them. If you disagree with them, then you have two options: argue or bite your tongue. Neither one is much fun and they both create distance – the opposite of promoting true partnership.

We have an alternative that naturally results in more freedom, intimacy and the experience of partnership. It works because a mans values, standards and ethics are always present in his opinions.

Try this: While a man is expressing his opinion, instead of asking yourself the question, “Do I agree or disagree?” ask yourself “What is he revealing about himself right now?” or “What is he showing me?” If you listen this way, you’ll hear what is behind that opinion – his commitments, his passions, his integrity or his dreams.

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Alison Armstrong is founder of Celebrating Men, Satisfying Women®.

PAX provides a limited number of Celebrating Men, Satisfying Women by Request workshops in areas outside of our regularly scheduled cities. Get more information about PAX and PAX workshops here.